Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
Randomize
