hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
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