She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
