this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
