the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
I will be naked everywhere
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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