every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Send help, water and tortillas.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
Randomize
