Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
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