I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
