im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
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