can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
