Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize
