Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
My ass is underappreciated
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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