yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
