those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
