I hate your face
Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
Randomize