Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
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