Already got asked if we're dating
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
