hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
How many fucks given?
0.12846
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
So vagazzling was a success
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
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