I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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