I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
your thong is hanging out like whoa
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
Randomize
