My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
