clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Randomize
