their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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