Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
