How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Randomize
