she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize
