So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize
