so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
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