HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I don't deserve a penis
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize