so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
