What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
Randomize
