Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
Randomize