Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
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