If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
Randomize