i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
420 ftw
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
