I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
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