Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize
