i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
