I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
Randomize
