I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
