One girl and one boy is just not enough.
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
Randomize
