and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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