I accidentally had phone sex last night
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
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