somebody snuck up and got me drunk
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
