her vagine was all disorganized.
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize