k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
