Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
I puked a lego.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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