no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
