your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Sober January is a disaster.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Randomize
