party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Randomize
